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thirteenrocksI feel if I neglected my journal of late, and i have so much to say, and so little time to say it. I am at my folks tonight after a wonderful weekend camping. I'll head back to MN tomarrow. It's july 13, and i have seen enough 13's today to last a lifetime. And I am bound and determined that the number 13 is connected to me somehow. Almost like harry potter and his scar... when i see 13 it means something good or something is going to happen. And yet I degress... I degress...
I feel better today than I did the previouse days. Not sure what it was, but the last time I updated my journal, my neurons wern't fireing correctly. Not sure exactly what it was, but things upstairs were not right, and it scared me. I am glad that I am doing better, although I had to cancel my Karla Apt, because of my court date this week. BLEH.
Havn't heard from Joshua yet. That mother fucker bastard. Had a good talk with roxanne about that the other night at work. That all men want is sex, and I havn't yet (well B.P.) that are interested in a relationship than my big dick. I don't know even where to begin.
Camping was a fantastic time. I bonded with mom some, and her and I had a good talk about my dad on the way up. However, my gay-ness or lack of hetrosexuality, never came up.. well it did in her bedroom tonight as I was on the computer and she hinted why I was going to wausau in a few weeks, and I didn't have the courage or the strenght to be: I am going to wausau for gay pride, I am running for Miss gay Wi in november and you should be proud of me for this fact. It is a good thing, I am not sleeping around (as much as I used to HA HA), and I am staying safe. But I didn't. I did what I usually do, and skip around the issue... and she didn't have the strength to land the bullsye and say, I know you are a fag, and lets talk about it. When am I ever going to have the courage?????????
Camping was fantastic.. I hung out with some sarcastic adults, drank too much, ate too much, and saw too many built men without shirts. I have to admit that I was gaucking or drooling too much at Matt who was married to Alisa in our group. In fact, I would of paid MONEY to see him in a swimsuit, but I felt that he caught on to me right away, when he didn't look at me when I sat next to him for dinner last night. And then my thinking dawned on me...maybe he is dealing with sexual issues of his own..and maybe he wants to explore his repressed homosexulaity, but maybe that was just me. Alissa's brother who used to be a poster child for ritalin (NO FUCKING JOKE HERE), had grown up and was built like a shit brick house. I saw him the other night, drying off near his camper with no shirt on. I about died of a heart-attack. BUILT like a fucking shit brick house. WOuld pay money to see him naked, but I don't think he has a big dick... .mmaybe it is just aht I am horney.
Margie sure opened up a can of worms when she suggested about my "girl" kara, and where she had been. That was a can of worms, and I kind of darted the question with truth and xsaid she is out of my life... by her choice. Guess there isn't much to say about that, now is there. I wonder what margie things about fags, although I know she is pretty much open and her married friend doug is hot as hell.......
Just overall had a great time camping. It was weird thought, because the last time I was with this group and with mom camping was 10 years ago. Things have changed, and it was so unique to see the changes not only in the campsite but in the people as well. The guys grew up... people have changed, and I feel at times that I got closer to stephanie, whereas prior years, I always felt the odd one out. It was like comming back after years of hibernation and seeing if anything has changed...and to be honest, it had. And for once, I felt that I broke through that glass cieling and became an adult... taht calling an adult by there first name was o.k. because as an adult myself there are no mr. mrs, ms... it's all about first names... I broke through the glass ceiling and have entered the world of adult hood.
Finished Harry Potter on the way home from camping after the "accident" **please see nurses notes for that** But, I have my own theories and suggeestions. I have to admit, the book started out completely shitty, I was confused, disorientated and pissed off at Professor umbridge. HBOwever, now that she is still alive, I have to have faith that she will die of a horible death, becuase I can't stand that bitch. As I got into the book, I realised why I LOVE J.K. rollings writting style so much. Her twists and turns and surprises that make so much sense are to DIE FOR. Specially when I found out the connection between Harry and Longbottom, and why harry has to stay the summers at Pivit drive. It makes all sense to me now. It does. But of course I have my own speculations and theories:
1) It will come down to bad vs good. J.k. has mentioned this in the intervies on the DVD's. The question is... is this going to be a happy ending???
2) There is definately something going on with the past because more and more comes out about james and lilly potter. In fact, the more and more we read, the more connections to the first book come to light.
3). She mentioned and it has been well published that the last word of the series is "SCAR."
4). I am not sure if anyone else has picked up on this, but the fact that she stated " Hogworts, a history" in all 5 novels... makes me feel that the TITLE OF THE LAST BOOK is going to be "Harry potter: hogwarts, a history." and somehow maybe harry's death, will make the history books, and what we have been reading all this time, is a retelling of the story. That in fact, all this has happened before, and the seires will be, not harry potter but HOgwarts, a history. I think this holds much water.
I am anxious to get to texas to see brianparis. I feel that there is a reason why I must go there... although I do not know that reason of yet.
Well, it's time for bed. I must run. I will try to update mr. jounal in the a.m.
Sweet dreams
I feel better today than I did the previouse days. Not sure what it was, but the last time I updated my journal, my neurons wern't fireing correctly. Not sure exactly what it was, but things upstairs were not right, and it scared me. I am glad that I am doing better, although I had to cancel my Karla Apt, because of my court date this week. BLEH.
Havn't heard from Joshua yet. That mother fucker bastard. Had a good talk with roxanne about that the other night at work. That all men want is sex, and I havn't yet (well B.P.) that are interested in a relationship than my big dick. I don't know even where to begin.
Camping was a fantastic time. I bonded with mom some, and her and I had a good talk about my dad on the way up. However, my gay-ness or lack of hetrosexuality, never came up.. well it did in her bedroom tonight as I was on the computer and she hinted why I was going to wausau in a few weeks, and I didn't have the courage or the strenght to be: I am going to wausau for gay pride, I am running for Miss gay Wi in november and you should be proud of me for this fact. It is a good thing, I am not sleeping around (as much as I used to HA HA), and I am staying safe. But I didn't. I did what I usually do, and skip around the issue... and she didn't have the strength to land the bullsye and say, I know you are a fag, and lets talk about it. When am I ever going to have the courage?????????
Camping was fantastic.. I hung out with some sarcastic adults, drank too much, ate too much, and saw too many built men without shirts. I have to admit that I was gaucking or drooling too much at Matt who was married to Alisa in our group. In fact, I would of paid MONEY to see him in a swimsuit, but I felt that he caught on to me right away, when he didn't look at me when I sat next to him for dinner last night. And then my thinking dawned on me...maybe he is dealing with sexual issues of his own..and maybe he wants to explore his repressed homosexulaity, but maybe that was just me. Alissa's brother who used to be a poster child for ritalin (NO FUCKING JOKE HERE), had grown up and was built like a shit brick house. I saw him the other night, drying off near his camper with no shirt on. I about died of a heart-attack. BUILT like a fucking shit brick house. WOuld pay money to see him naked, but I don't think he has a big dick... .mmaybe it is just aht I am horney.
Margie sure opened up a can of worms when she suggested about my "girl" kara, and where she had been. That was a can of worms, and I kind of darted the question with truth and xsaid she is out of my life... by her choice. Guess there isn't much to say about that, now is there. I wonder what margie things about fags, although I know she is pretty much open and her married friend doug is hot as hell.......
Just overall had a great time camping. It was weird thought, because the last time I was with this group and with mom camping was 10 years ago. Things have changed, and it was so unique to see the changes not only in the campsite but in the people as well. The guys grew up... people have changed, and I feel at times that I got closer to stephanie, whereas prior years, I always felt the odd one out. It was like comming back after years of hibernation and seeing if anything has changed...and to be honest, it had. And for once, I felt that I broke through that glass cieling and became an adult... taht calling an adult by there first name was o.k. because as an adult myself there are no mr. mrs, ms... it's all about first names... I broke through the glass ceiling and have entered the world of adult hood.
Finished Harry Potter on the way home from camping after the "accident" **please see nurses notes for that** But, I have my own theories and suggeestions. I have to admit, the book started out completely shitty, I was confused, disorientated and pissed off at Professor umbridge. HBOwever, now that she is still alive, I have to have faith that she will die of a horible death, becuase I can't stand that bitch. As I got into the book, I realised why I LOVE J.K. rollings writting style so much. Her twists and turns and surprises that make so much sense are to DIE FOR. Specially when I found out the connection between Harry and Longbottom, and why harry has to stay the summers at Pivit drive. It makes all sense to me now. It does. But of course I have my own speculations and theories:
1) It will come down to bad vs good. J.k. has mentioned this in the intervies on the DVD's. The question is... is this going to be a happy ending???
2) There is definately something going on with the past because more and more comes out about james and lilly potter. In fact, the more and more we read, the more connections to the first book come to light.
3). She mentioned and it has been well published that the last word of the series is "SCAR."
4). I am not sure if anyone else has picked up on this, but the fact that she stated " Hogworts, a history" in all 5 novels... makes me feel that the TITLE OF THE LAST BOOK is going to be "Harry potter: hogwarts, a history." and somehow maybe harry's death, will make the history books, and what we have been reading all this time, is a retelling of the story. That in fact, all this has happened before, and the seires will be, not harry potter but HOgwarts, a history. I think this holds much water.
I am anxious to get to texas to see brianparis. I feel that there is a reason why I must go there... although I do not know that reason of yet.
Well, it's time for bed. I must run. I will try to update mr. jounal in the a.m.
Sweet dreams
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Date: 14 Jul 2003 00:08 (UTC)I'm back
Date: 14 Jul 2003 05:02 (UTC)