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thirteenrocksand get possibly a little, philosophical. Which, never happens.
Last night, I felt like complete warmed over, steamed, microwaved, hit by a mack-truck piece of hammered shit. My fever finally broke, and I ran into the hospital to check my temp *note to self, ask Santa for a temp-checker*, and to have my scripts fullfilled that the Doc gave me on Wednesday. Great to see my co-workers again, and talk to "Kim". I'm doing better today, making progress, and feeling better than I have been.
Incidently, I have hap-hazardly taken myself off the zoloft, because I forgot to take it for a few days. Which reminds me: to get back on it. Not that I think I need it-I rather just have it on board, a little saftey net.
I have an appointment with my shrink next Wednesday. I planned this ahead of time, because I knew I would want to see her after returning to the mainland. The last time we visited, she somehow brought up my parents and my comming out experience to them. I commonly refer to this as the "Theater Camp Expereince" (for future reference, and will known as TCE). Not only have I not thought about that time period in decades, I havn't told many people about it either. It happened back in 1994, and the people involved are no longer apart of my life. The TCE not only is long, detailed, and involves among other things police, lies, and a twice winning award essay. Eventually I want to talk to Karla (my therapist) about this, however it will have to be when I am "ready", and only on those terms.
Who knows what I'll talk about when I get in her office. Not that I don't have a long list of things to discuss...
I've been toiling with this idea of friends lately, and more specifically not only the choices I have made, the friends I have and the friends I have HAD. There are some things I would like to tell to people, face to face. The consequence of comming across as being a bitch, narcistic, or self-centered, prevents the brutal honesty. The book "The myth of you and me", is part of that, plus some selected musical selections that have "hit" home to closely. I'm attempting to have a more positive outlook on life, and not look so negative on situations that I don't have controls over, and accept the positive aspects. For example: that I have great healthcare coverage, a support group of people I can call to help me out (specially since I do live alone, and am single), that I have had the opportunity to travel the world, that Kara was apart of my life, that I met Allan, things that I am thankfull for. I still maintain that not only experiences happen for a reason, and that people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.
Sometime in the next few weeks, I want to write Scott, the guy I met in the Millwaulkee Airport last year. Its on my massive "TO DO" list. I have to process a few things before that happens....
Amy Armstrong was on the cruise, as the entertainment. This song I saw perform live, and I've been listening to it alot today....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53XTHG6_XFQ
"How love is rare, and life is strange.....nothing lasts, people change........."
Last night, I felt like complete warmed over, steamed, microwaved, hit by a mack-truck piece of hammered shit. My fever finally broke, and I ran into the hospital to check my temp *note to self, ask Santa for a temp-checker*, and to have my scripts fullfilled that the Doc gave me on Wednesday. Great to see my co-workers again, and talk to "Kim". I'm doing better today, making progress, and feeling better than I have been.
Incidently, I have hap-hazardly taken myself off the zoloft, because I forgot to take it for a few days. Which reminds me: to get back on it. Not that I think I need it-I rather just have it on board, a little saftey net.
I have an appointment with my shrink next Wednesday. I planned this ahead of time, because I knew I would want to see her after returning to the mainland. The last time we visited, she somehow brought up my parents and my comming out experience to them. I commonly refer to this as the "Theater Camp Expereince" (for future reference, and will known as TCE). Not only have I not thought about that time period in decades, I havn't told many people about it either. It happened back in 1994, and the people involved are no longer apart of my life. The TCE not only is long, detailed, and involves among other things police, lies, and a twice winning award essay. Eventually I want to talk to Karla (my therapist) about this, however it will have to be when I am "ready", and only on those terms.
Who knows what I'll talk about when I get in her office. Not that I don't have a long list of things to discuss...
I've been toiling with this idea of friends lately, and more specifically not only the choices I have made, the friends I have and the friends I have HAD. There are some things I would like to tell to people, face to face. The consequence of comming across as being a bitch, narcistic, or self-centered, prevents the brutal honesty. The book "The myth of you and me", is part of that, plus some selected musical selections that have "hit" home to closely. I'm attempting to have a more positive outlook on life, and not look so negative on situations that I don't have controls over, and accept the positive aspects. For example: that I have great healthcare coverage, a support group of people I can call to help me out (specially since I do live alone, and am single), that I have had the opportunity to travel the world, that Kara was apart of my life, that I met Allan, things that I am thankfull for. I still maintain that not only experiences happen for a reason, and that people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.
Sometime in the next few weeks, I want to write Scott, the guy I met in the Millwaulkee Airport last year. Its on my massive "TO DO" list. I have to process a few things before that happens....
Amy Armstrong was on the cruise, as the entertainment. This song I saw perform live, and I've been listening to it alot today....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=53XTHG6_XFQ
"How love is rare, and life is strange.....nothing lasts, people change........."
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Date: 8 Mar 2008 06:39 (UTC)Hugs, Jon