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thirteenrocksLately, more recent than not, my entire reality seems as if nothing but a major fog. A fog, dream state with no beginning, middle, or end. And as clicheic as it may be-direction, focus. It's as if i've turned into this octopus with so many arms and legs, reaching out in directions of interests, friends focus, and not able to leach on one thing... not to put all my energy into that one vital item. Sometimes I just don't understand.
I'm not 100% sold on the La Crosse Plan- in some parts and some parts not. It's beating a dead horse over and over and over and over and over and over, and yet... it needs to be right for me. I don't know I have a hard time picturing myself or placing myself in any future endevor and location, place, time, situation. I don't see that. My crystal ball-its a foggy.
Partly because I've screwed up my already screwed up sleep pattern, that, and I don't know, things are just different now. They are---
I guess the problem I see, is that moving to La Crosse, and still working at Mayo isn't really going to solve anything--mayb I need a bigger change than that. Then I really look at my situation right now... where I live, what I do, my travel adventures, my situation, and I ask myself, is this all bad.... is it. It's hard to uproot comfort and security... isn't that what change is all about.... I guess I just dont' want to fuck up a good thing...more specifcially, my financial situation, my travel, my vacation, the fact I work 3 nights a week....in what I like to do....what I am good at.
I'm not 100% sold on the La Crosse Plan- in some parts and some parts not. It's beating a dead horse over and over and over and over and over and over, and yet... it needs to be right for me. I don't know I have a hard time picturing myself or placing myself in any future endevor and location, place, time, situation. I don't see that. My crystal ball-its a foggy.
Partly because I've screwed up my already screwed up sleep pattern, that, and I don't know, things are just different now. They are---
I guess the problem I see, is that moving to La Crosse, and still working at Mayo isn't really going to solve anything--mayb I need a bigger change than that. Then I really look at my situation right now... where I live, what I do, my travel adventures, my situation, and I ask myself, is this all bad.... is it. It's hard to uproot comfort and security... isn't that what change is all about.... I guess I just dont' want to fuck up a good thing...more specifcially, my financial situation, my travel, my vacation, the fact I work 3 nights a week....in what I like to do....what I am good at.