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Checking in
17 November 2007 01:46After work on Thrusday, I worked out at the gym, hit Salvation Army, and proceeded to go to bed. I slept for over 12 hours having some bizzare dreams.
Although I usually update at least once a day, I havn't lately. Not because there hasn't been anything to write about. Because I'm not sure how to approach what I have been thinking/feeling.
Because, I'm really on this road for self discovery. Not for a day trip, but for the long haul. I'm trying to figure out what I am feeling, and reflecting on some input from others in my social circle that I don't agree with-at all......
I've written entries, and notes-privately. I'm not ready to post my soul to the world. However the English language and I are not working together.
I have a shrink appointment Monday with Karla. I went back to her, because I felt I was slipping, and wanted to have a life-jacket in place, just in case I started to fall. This is a decision, I'm quite proud of. I also went back on the Zoloft, 100mg. Frank mentioned last week that I am doing better. His observation. Not mine per se.
Although she isn't giving me the insight I would like, and sometimes I feel that I am a bore to her... which isn't validated... she's known my situation for quite some time having seen here for about 3 years prior, she's knows the history, which for the purpose of therapy, is a good thing.
I cut my hair. The last time it was cut, was in March, late March, prior to flying out to Washington, D.C. to meet up with Allan.
I also have been going to the gym-ALOT. Average once or twice a day. Not because of the highly held notion I'm using the gym to look at naked men or in the search of a "hook-up". I find going postal on a tred mill listening to dance music, and spacing out in front of the television to be an act of meditation and soul searching. They eye candy isn't bad either.
Therefore, as a warning, I'm here. I may start posting more introspective entries-just to be aware, and I wanted to make sure that people knew I wasn't at home on the couch eating bon-bons while crying to "Steel Magnolias", or striking a tab--------with draino.
Although I usually update at least once a day, I havn't lately. Not because there hasn't been anything to write about. Because I'm not sure how to approach what I have been thinking/feeling.
Because, I'm really on this road for self discovery. Not for a day trip, but for the long haul. I'm trying to figure out what I am feeling, and reflecting on some input from others in my social circle that I don't agree with-at all......
I've written entries, and notes-privately. I'm not ready to post my soul to the world. However the English language and I are not working together.
I have a shrink appointment Monday with Karla. I went back to her, because I felt I was slipping, and wanted to have a life-jacket in place, just in case I started to fall. This is a decision, I'm quite proud of. I also went back on the Zoloft, 100mg. Frank mentioned last week that I am doing better. His observation. Not mine per se.
Although she isn't giving me the insight I would like, and sometimes I feel that I am a bore to her... which isn't validated... she's known my situation for quite some time having seen here for about 3 years prior, she's knows the history, which for the purpose of therapy, is a good thing.
I cut my hair. The last time it was cut, was in March, late March, prior to flying out to Washington, D.C. to meet up with Allan.
I also have been going to the gym-ALOT. Average once or twice a day. Not because of the highly held notion I'm using the gym to look at naked men or in the search of a "hook-up". I find going postal on a tred mill listening to dance music, and spacing out in front of the television to be an act of meditation and soul searching. They eye candy isn't bad either.
Therefore, as a warning, I'm here. I may start posting more introspective entries-just to be aware, and I wanted to make sure that people knew I wasn't at home on the couch eating bon-bons while crying to "Steel Magnolias", or striking a tab--------with draino.