Catcher in the rye

Its during episodes of the Terri S. case, and now the health of the Pope, that I am glad I don't subscribe to the rath of media. They are opinionated leaches on the world of suburbia, whose thoughts lie clearly in a dog eat dog world and less on the infomation they are projecting forth. The media doesn't know shit from shinola, and its better to be in the dark, than in the spotlight.

I'm still mulling over what was said (and wasn't) Tuesday night. There was some miscommunication of sorts. Maybe I was too busy hauling bricks and building walls. Yeah, that's it.

@ times I feel I am severly misunderstood.

I've met and contacted hundreds if not 1,000's of people in my lifetime. Some I've known for a moment, others longer. Some I keep in contact with (very few), and others not at all. Its almost what he said in regards to judd: "did you email, exchange #'s"... it wasn't like that. Also its not humanly possible to keep in contact and have any "sort. of. relationship" with EVERYONE you meet and get along with..... Its as if your a Catcher in the rye, trying to save each other, and not yourself.

Others see it differntly. Possibly its the way you make contacts, reach out. Get to know people.....

Lately I have been having alot of lows.........

(no subject)

Best not to play with fire, on windy days. She had a very valid point. Why give the demons any more ammo than they already have. Rushing into fame and glamour got no one farther than a broken heal.

Its the same reason why I got out of drag in the first place, why jump back into it so blindly. Jump in the river my friend, it isn't a good idea!!

Best laid plans tonight, on the couch, maybe a nap, vegetate-lay like brocoli.

Lately I feel as if I am spinning my wheels no where fast. Due to the constraints of rule breaking, hierarchy of needs, and fucking politics. In a dog eat dog world, the pomagrant stands alone.

And they are right; all of them: I build steel mason walls around, contruct castles out of clouds, hibernate, make friens with the gloom.

3:50 a.m. do you know where my spark is? I have no spark, no drive, nothing pulling me ahead. I'm treading water fast.....

"... and you give yourself, and you give yourself, and you give yourself away... with or without you..."