quick notes

1) Debbie: here we go again..with the tests, and the fear, and the guilt and hating oneself

2) treesandmagma:I have other things I need to spend money on.

Unexpected Phone Calls

auryn24 Thanks for calling me. It was the highlight of my night. Feel free to call again!

Alot of this and alot of that

sometimes one really knows who his friends are. Thanks to Imyaj, and auryn24 for the unexpected but delightfull phone calls. My sister, sent me a card out of the blue, which also made my day. I'm not going to wallow in my own self-pity "Poor me, poor me, poor me another". I know the ugly green monster is back-I slept again alot today, and alot last night..and I am determined to "face the music" and fight it...hopefully for the last battle...

Speaking of which, my little shrink session on Thrusday. I got there, and she ushered me into her cubical of an office, and I sat down on the blue couch thingy like I always do. She sat down and asked how I have been doing. Mind you, I havn't seen her since before Christmas. I told her what was going on, about being so tired, so unmotivated, not eating. Surprisingly she took notes on what i was saying, and asked alot of questions: when did it start, ect ect. ect.... I felt that as a postive, that she was really concerned. Personally I think she is going to mention it to my Dr. and see what he thinks about all of this. She agreed with me, that increasing the dosage of zoloft was probably a good thing. 150 mg, here I go! We talked about what was going on, about my brother getting hte playboy magazine in his stocking, and Karla made a profound statement, that I probably say things don't bother me, but then let them simmer and stir untill they build up.

Yeah, I'd say that would be a good observation.

I would write more, but Iam starting to fall alsleep

Glass houses and Giant Rocks

Came into work tonight and was picking up 3 pts from Carol. She approaced me, and started to read me the riot act, about how a DR. was upsett that Isadore's temp wasn't taken every four hours. She went on and on, and then grabbed the order book, showed me the order, and mentioned that the Dr. was going to speak to our Nurse manager about this. O.k. That's fine. I fucked up. But why didn't the evening shift pass the message on about the temp, and why didn't the resident make note of it as well... whatever...no big deal life goes on

After report, I looked at the chart of Bertha, who was another pt, being taken care of by Carol. Her VS had NOT been taken since 0600 (it's now 1945), and nohting was charted on since 1400. There were spaces blank on the chart, and she forgot to sign it. WTF!

Don't fucking bitch at me for not taking a temp, when you yourself, didn't chart properly, and didn't monitor a temp or vs on your patient for over 12 hours.

*Smash the glass*