Internet Cafes can be difficult to find, on foriegn soil. Sometimes, but not as a standard, hostels have an internet station, either really cheap, or really expensive-never in between.

At other times, a computer with access can be found in the most unlikely places: railroad terminals, bars, a car garage.

The car garage was nestled in an off street that twisted and turned, therefore getting lost was accepted. The signs helped-ALOT. I didn't know what I was getting myself into, walking down the street with my small backpack on my back. What I needed was access.

Two computers sat in a small room, that was almost an office. I paid the attendent a few euros, and had at it. It was here, in Nice, France that I ordered my copy of "The Alchamist", from Barnes and Noble, so that when I returned state-side, it would be awaiting for me. Because I knew-there was another piece of the puzzle, and the book was it.

I could have possibly been in a post-ectal stage, from the experience, because it was just one of several unique opportunities I had during the weeks prior to "our" meeting. I knew, it would be one of the big ones-something I could disect, examine, crucify.

For I also knew, I wouldn't ever see him again. Not only were we heading different directions: him to Nice, and I to italy, it was obviouse by his harsh departure in the morning, that this-was it. Goodbye. It was because of this, I made the decision to capture his face on film, because I knew my memory would want a jump start. I needed proof. I needed a damn souvineer that says: I WAS HERE. After he left, I took a photo of everything in the room, including the dust rhinos below the metalic framed bunk beds.

After he left, my plan was to sit on the beach, and write. Poor weather, prohibited that-therefore I wrote in odd locations: on stairs, on a bench, in a coffee shop, anywhere I could find, or when my memory was jogged-from trying to recall every single detail, of the past twenty four hours. Because this wasn't just a chance meeting, this was fate.

The night was lonley. I stayed in, and had the room to myself. THe house-keeper made the bed by the time I returned from exploring, erasing any trace, that there had been someone in the bed the night before.

In the morning I continued on my way, eventually returning home, to a bin of mail. One of the parcels was the "Alchamist", my own welcome home gift.....

...He's 21 studing in Oxford, relgion, from chicao. I asked what relgion he was and he said Jewish. He meenditoned on the beach he had a pink floyd shirt with hebrew on it and some guy made acomment about it, and I had mentioned that I was in dacaue and he said that it didn't bother him. I went and took a long shower, thinking "O MY GOD" and after wards he said " I bet that shower felt good afte ra long day" and I said "It did". He asked me If I wanted to go to as jazz club with him that night and I said sure. We small talked and he asked what I did, and I said I was a nurse, and he said he was involved in a ski accident and hurt his kidney and had a tube in his "penis" how it hurt comming out. He said he was on a beach today and got to see some of the toppless women. I went along with that, and played the straight roll. He said he wrote poetry and meditated on the beach. Well he got ready, he switched shirts and wore a short sleaved button down with the ends open and put on cologne. THe club "De Klump" was one he rad about in "LETS GO" so we got out the maps and headed out. We talked about the hostel he said the night before there were 2 girls in the room and htat he had gone out to see the movie the hours byhimeslf. He said it was a great movie and it was about virgina woolfe and we talked all the way to the club. On hte way to the klub he talked about going to see tyhe hours and how it was in english with french subtitles and how it was about virgina wolf and got to the club--he had "leffe" bear and I had a st. johns beer for 6.50 euros a piece which was spendy. They ahd a nice bar, very english looking or irish looking. we sat and talked. It was really a first time for me to have a long conversation with another guy who was/is will be "striaight". We talked about fate, that there is a reason and purpose to everything.. He rcomemnded a book called the alchamst (which I've orderd already at b and n.com which should be ready when I return). ANd another which I don't recall. He said he was going on to arles france and into spain, that htere was a reason he wanted to go there ...he said he had bee nto india and also wanted to live abraod and had accomplished both of these goals. I told him aout going to florence into rome and he suggested,two small towns seina and san giammio that are in the hills (ON a side note I seriously thought about going to both of these towns and reaad about them in my lets go guide but after thining of having myrtle on my back and really not having spet time in florence, I waivered it.). The band started and although not jazz (he said he loved jazz and I techno) they were realitively good. They started to play imagine and then thank you by led zeplin-the lead guitar was amazing, very good vibe to it, we left as he wanted to get back and up early in the a.m. on the way back we talked about the location of the hostel and the band and once in we got ready for bed and talked some more and what I wrote down in my little daily notebook was "electricity or me" there was definate energy in the air and that isn't whisteling dixie my friend. well I cralwed into bed and as Judd got undressed he had a boner in his ck boxers. The tone became more sexual and the problem was well not a problem, but were wer the only 2 in a room for 6. He said "too bad there wern't 2 other girls-we could have an orgy" He said he was horny anda sex finatic. He mentioned at some point he has had sex with 80 girls and I told him I was 28 and a nurse going back to school for costume design and he either pro hocky or work with afriacn poverty. He got into bed and was looking at his lets go and said about the club that it was "Gay friendly". This opened a big door and i siad that i have to ask if he's gay. He immediately asked if I was and I said, i asked you first, the mechinisms of my defense. He said no, but he had been with two jmen before 1) he kissed and 2) he was in a train and a guy looked at him, that everyone inclued men look at him and he got sucked off in the train, he said that he is bisexual but hasn't said anything to friends or family. He asked if the butt the anus had nerve endings or if, how it feels he states that he finds womene very sensual and that he doesn't with a man and he can't figure out foreplay. He said the he knew I was. I said that I had been trying to examine him all night with his manursisms carriage and demenor how he talks. He said the he was attracted to me, but my free spirit about me and that this is very remarkable. He asked me if I was attracted to him and I said that I was, but not specific... i dodged that one. He said he could have sex with me but it is differnt because we are talking about it and he said he spent alot of time writting poetry and mediatting on the beach and that he sees a therapist and he shareshis thoughts. I told him I see one for depressions and breifely told him about Kara and on meds. He said he j/o to gay porn and that he got up and commented on this painting on the wal, and I got up to go to pee and lets say this painting was really crappy. I got back and near him and he commented on the painitng and hecame closer and kissed me and we touched each other on the crotch shirts came off, pants soon followed and he gave me a blow job and sucked on him, he has a wonderful body and treasure trail and also has a veyr hairy bush, i played with his ass, he repeately said he wanted to be fucked and got out a condom but I didnt' he came in my mout hand the nstood there naked and I said was going to J/o and he said whatever man. But I never came we stood there naked and he said I was bigger than him, 2 men standing naked..he asked If I had slept with anyone on the triap, I said, no but I lied and old him about john and I being off and on, and then we got dressed. Although I thought we could sleep together but no go he said he enjoyed it but he could stick his finger up there, and that it could be any mouth but it wasn't. We talked some more and went back to bed. In the a.m. he left before I did and he and I hugged. We shook hands and he left.. I spent the day thinking of the expierence that night it was odd being alone in the room veyr oddand strange in a way to not have anyone there..how many nights I have spent alone in a room with nohting but your thoughts (a quote from shawshank redemption).